Why Are Fundies Illiterate?

I seem to have attracted a number of fundies and creationists, most likely due to the fact that I’ve been talking about Kent Hovind. [info]curvemudgeon has pointed out that for some reason, they can’t seem to go four sentences without committing crimes against the English language (so it’s not just me). Why is that?

Aside from the obvious, I mean. That they’re uneducated rednecks who’ve tragically never been taught to think or how to learn, otherwise they wouldn’t be creationists?

I know that there are smart and educated people who can’t spell or compose a sentence, but still, I think we have a large enough sample to draw some conclusions.

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11 Responses to Why Are Fundies Illiterate?

  1. Artkau says:

    Yowser… you’re really offending a whole bunch of people with kind of statement hey?

    Fundie.
    South Africa

    Like

  2. jferg says:

    Come now, what are you, some kind of grammar fundamentalist? :->

    Like

  3. arensb says:

    Artkau:

    Yowser… you’re really offending a whole bunch of people with kind of statement hey?

    Yeah, well, there are a whole bunch of people who need offending.

    (Oh, and I don’t know whether English is your first language or not, but you’re not disproving my thesis, are you?)

    Like

  4. Fez says:

    Artkau,

    My overwhelmingly objectionable answer would be to say that arensb’s statement is far less objectionable than an evangelicalism of ignorance, but to stop there would be simple trolling.

    As I interpret it arensb’s comment encompassed only those who chose to participate in discussions here. To look over the available evidence it is hard to deny that there is a valid point made. Certainly the occasional typographical error will appear in any person’s contributions, and one should also allow for passion-induced carelessness, but this does not explain nor excuse the repeated syntactic and semantic grammar violations demonstrated. Take a scan through a longer discussion thread such as this one as exhibit A.

    More troubling to me after a reexamination of said thread is that those YEC supporters who self-identify as living, and I assumine were also educated, outside of the United States present themselves in a superior fashion to the natives. In my opinion this reflects poorly upon the state of education in the US but I am not unwilling to consider other possible explanations, such as a genetic correlation between carelessness and acceptance of a poorly defensible position such as YEC.

    I would suggest that if one decides to take a questionable, minority position on a subject, one should endeavor to put their best foot forward.

    Like

  5. Jani says:

    I have an Associate’s, Bachelor’s, Master’s and Juris Doctor Degree (yes, I am a lawyer) and am proud to be called a “Fundie.” Yes, the period goes INSIDE the parenthasis, for all those intellectuals out there who think they are the elite of society. Yes, God IS intimately involved in our lives. NO, I am not any more “arrogant” than the lefties, who close their eyes to the FACT that Jesus Christ is Lord.

    You complain that Christians are trying to “push” their theology on the population. Meanwhilewhile liberals continually shove their ideals down our throats. Liberals cry for diversity, tolerance and acceptance, UNLESS a conservative is in the mix. Hypocrisy? Liberals (believe it or not) can claim this better than anyone.

    Every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the Glory of God the Father.

    http://www.seekgod.org/bible/jesusisgod.html

    Like

  6. Fez says:

    Jani,

    I’ll see your impressive collection of education power-up cards and raise you the All Seeing Orb Of The Order Of Nookienumnutz! I win! Hahaha!

    Associate’s, Bachelor’s, Master’s and Juris Doctor Degree

    From http://main.uab.edu/show.asp?durki=7713 :

    List only terminal degrees (the highest degree a person has received)
    […]
    When referring to degrees in general, lowercase the first letter of the degree and use an apostrophe: bachelor’s and master’s degrees, never bachelors and masters degrees.

    Strikes one and two…

    …(yes, I am a lawyer) and am proud to be called a “Fundie.” Yes, the period goes INSIDE the parenthasis,…

    In context, your statement makes no sense as your parenthetical statement contains no punctuation; in the antecedent sentence the last use of punctuation was (correctly, good for you!) placed interior to the terminating quotation mark. Out of context the statement is simply incorrect as can be seen at the same link as above, but under the letter ‘P’:

    Always place a period inside parentheses or brackets when the parenthetical matter is an independent sentence forming no part of the preceding sentence; otherwise, place the period outside the parentheses or brackets

    Assuming confusion on your part please allow me to offer a little clarity. ” is a “quotation mark”, and () are parentheses. You will also please note the correct spelling of “parentheses”. See, it’s easy! Isn’t learning fun?

    Strikes three through six. Six errors in just your opening four sentences. If your briefs are as poorly constituted as this it’s no wonder that you’re hanging out here instead of practicing law.

    Having firmly established a pattern of careless, perhaps even willfully ignorant, behavior on the part of the defendant, the jury can easily conclude that the defendant’s remaing statements are the unsupported, delusional ravings of a broken mind. We are not without compassion however, and ask that the court be lenient in their sentencing considerations.

    Like

  7. GORGE says:

    I easy conclude that you, Mr Fez, have also made a careless mistake in your remaining statements. I fear that the court may be harsh in sentencing you for your wilful “head up own backside behavior.”

    Like

  8. Fez says:

    GORGE,

    Three months and that’s the best you can come up with? “Remaining statements” implies there were prior statements that were addressed in some fashion…which you didn’t. Forget to install the thinky part of the brain today, sunshine?

    Like

  9. GORGE says:

    Fez,
    Three months since you added your post, true. As for reading your post the first and only time and posting my reply to it; same day delivery. The “Remaining statements” was only applied to highlight the grammatical nistake, whoops sorry Mistake, within your post. Although only kiddin’ with yer, you are obviously a man of the world squire as far as the old literature side of thingies is concerned.

    Like

  10. GORGE says:

    Fez,
    Three months since you added your post, true. As for reading your post the first and only time and posting my reply to it; same day delivery. The “Remaining statements” was only applied to highlight the grammatical nistake, whoops sorry Mistake, within your post. Although only kiddin’ with yer, you are obviously a man of the world squire, as far as the old literature side of thingies is concerned.

    Like

  11. menes777 says:

    Sometimes I don’t care how atrocious their grammar or their spelling can be. It would be nice just to get some form of logic at least.

    Like

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